2017 Big Truck across the Midwest, Day 4

Day 4 got off to a rainy start, but we were not to be denied.  Until we got to the visitors center, which apparently is only staffed when someone feels like coming in. That does not happen before noon, regardless of what the posted hours claim.

Nevertheless, we headed down to the river's edge and watched Jordan strike her new favorite pose. It has gradually replaced the Borat overenthusiastic thumbs up from previous years. 

Can't wait to see what replaces this one.

Word on the street (and this giant sign) is that if you come here during a full moon on a clear night, you will see a moonbow across the falls. Sounds cool, but we were in no danger of seeing this phenomenon. The forecast basically called for a Sharknado the next 3 days.

Even though it was a steady drizzle, we decided to press on and check out the falls from a distance. Mostly because we had to, because the main viewing platform was fenced off and closed for construction.

The view was pretty impressive, but once you looked down all you saw were mountains of trash. I didn't have the heart to take a picture of it. Yet. More on that later.

Once we went a little further downstream to a lookout known as "Lovers Leap" (how many lovers leap off things? Seems every major high point has this feature. Seems a bit rash), you really got a sense for the scale of the falls & river canyon.

In a relatively surprising turn, this part actually allowed you to walk out past the end of the fenced walkway and find your own path along the shoreline.

We got to wander quite a bit, and since there had been a huge storm the previous night, there were fresh washouts on the shore, creating a cool mixture of the black rock/sand from the canyon walls with the beach sand.

Next up we got to climb on giant rocks. It would seem that Jordan would be happy doing this from sunup to sundown. There are worse things I suppose.

The view from atop said giant rock was pretty amazing. The drizzle was enough to keep away the hordes, so it almost felt like our own private park.

More rocks.

After some more wandering and a rainy lunch, we decided to scout out our next day's activity, hiking the trail to Eagle Falls.

Ok - I've held off as long as I can. Kentucky residents (Kentuckians? Kentucks? Tucksters?), what is your issue with trash/garbage/littering? This is one of the more beautiful places you can imagine, and I'm sure some of the trash can be blamed on the recent storm surge and things washing over the falls.

What is unlikely is that Big Gulp containers, candy wrappers, and all manner of cigarette packs wash up from the river onto the tables and benches all throughout the park. You can almost recreate someone's path, it's almost like Kentucky has reversed the 'Leave no Trace' policy an implemented a 'Let 'em know you were there' policy. If so, it is remarkably effective. It was making us all nearly physically angry walking around and just seeing trash lying everywhere. If you think I am exaggerating, google 'Cumberland Falls trash' or read a few reviews on Tripadvisor.

Pontificating over.

On to more important things, like Silly String.

As we closed our our night, since I had to punt on my planned ride at Sheltowee Trace & had done all the research already, Kimberly & I were able to watch the latest episode of Game of Thrones (I know, I'll save you the trouble...)

I won't spoil it for you. Instead you can watch this and know basically all you need to know about the show.

Day 5 - hopefully will get to ride the trail as well as hike Eagle Falls.

2017 Big Truck across the Midwest, Day 3

Day 3 began with another money breakfast (thanks Laura & Amy!), a little bit of drizzle, and lots of kids not wanting to leave.

As we were packing up, the kids kept migrating toward each other, knowing that this fun weekend was coming to an end.  A few more laps around the campground, and it was time for goodbyes.

Each family started to peel off and head for home, as we were getting started on the solo portion of our trip.  Thanks again to the Reinkes & Gentrys for a great weekend, and Brown County State Park is definitely on our return trip list.

Reinke had led a kid expedition earlier in the morning to the nature center, and the reports were good. Jordan is all about anything to do with nature (it's working!!), so we decided to hook up the Jeep and head over to the nature center with the full travel setup intact. Once there, immediate shenanigans...

Followed by a really cool birdfeeder/birdwatching setup pulling in everything from hummingbirds to fat doves to thieving squirrels. Its amazing how much of a class system exists among birds - someone needs to do a deep dive thesis on the segregated housing situation in their world. I digress...

Of course we found a nature trail, and Jordan's newfound affinity for hiking (more on that later - too bursting with pride) we decided to do the full loop. Doing a hike with 25 marked locations without the accompanying guidebook forces the imagination to work a bit, but we managed just fine. Here is one of the eleventy billion "Dad! Look at this" moments from the hike.

Having our fill of Brown County for the day, we turned our sights toward our next destination, Cumberland Falls. We knew very little about it, other than that it is allegedly slightly larger than Tahquamenon Falls back home, and that it wasn't in Ohio (an important prerequisite, there is nothing of value in or about that state).

Our GPS was very confused, as it was unaware of the construction of this bridge over the past 5 years. The GPS narrator chick took an aggressive turn with her 'recalculating' as we were crossing the Ohio River on 265.

One new development of note this year. This little monkey adding her commentary from the bowels of the big truck as we are traveling. As you can see from that smug little grin, she had just unleashed some clever dig about something I had done. Again, she has all of my worst traits - magnified. Mankind - I am sorry, and brace yourself. The snark is strong with this one.

We drew closer to our destination, but the dreary weather and thought of firing up the grill in the rain caused us to start searching out options in Lexington.  We settled on the growing empire of Hopcat, which used to be a mainstay of ours back home when Kimberly worked directly above it.

After a quick fix of crack fries and mac & cheese, we were off. But not until a certain someone started striking debutante poses while twirling her umbrella. I am screwed.

On our way out of town, we came across this little gem. I could do some actual research and find out why someone would locate a Transylvania University in Lexington, Kentucky but I prefer my theories* instead.

1) It was created as a movie set for a failed Will Farrell/Mark Wahlberg buddy movie and just left there after audiences saw The Other Guys, Daddy's Home, or Daddy's Home 2 

2) Adam Sandler demanded it's construction after finishing Hotel Transylvania 2 and realizing that animated movies are an even easier way to mail it in than filming Grown Ups 3

*of course I know how prestigious it is, how many presidents/senators have gone there, and that it has been around since 1780. Still a ridiculous name.

Immediately following Transylvania U, I give you....

DONK!  PS - it's for sale.

The rest of the trip - this.

Upon arrival at our campground (owned and run by a dude named Smurf), we found another nature trail.

and some cool bugs (filed under the vastly growing category of "Dad! Look at this!")

Under the fading light, we set up for bedtime and I started to research biking trails in the area, not realizing that we were mere minutes away from the Sheltowee Trace trail. Sometimes dumb luck beats planning.

Day 4 - Cumberland Falls.  Engage.

2017 Big Truck across the Midwest, Day 2

Day 2 started out a bit slowly, as the campfire shenanigans had left a mark on all of us. It was nice having a big ol' breakfast (we usually live by Clif bars and a light breakfast while traveling) thanks to the Reinkes & Gentrys.

There were lots of chances to tour the campground with any of the kids who were riding their bikes around. It brought back a lot of memories for me, as I can remember rocking the Huffy Pro Thunder around East Lake Campground for hours and hours.  After a quick recon ride to the trailhead, I headed back to campsite to get this party started.

One thing to note - the trail maps, kiosks, and trailheads are very well marked. The trails themselves looked amazing, so we set out to sweat out the fog and ride the trails. We had worked out a plan with the rest of the families to meet at the pool at the bottom of the hill and head into town after finishing the trails.

The first couple of trails were enough to knock the cobwebs loose, and from there on out it was a full go.  After a couple of sweeping descents and rock gardens, we happened upon Schooner.  I'll let the trail description speak for itself.

Even highly skilled riders are likely to find certain features they'd rather walk on this trail, so don't be disappointed if you have to do some hike-a-bike. Due to the extreme technical difficulty and relative remoteness of the trail, riders are encouraged to stop and scout features before riding them. 

The extent of our scouting and riding Schooner was this entrance and about another 200' of the trail. I managed to make it through the entry rock garden unscathed, shouldered into a tree about 100' in, and realized the folly of my ways after the first rock staircase. These two shots were all of my shortlived glory, but I felt good about letting it kick my ass for a bit.

 I won't bore everyone with a full play by play, but suffice it to say that anytime anyone I know is headed to Brown County and I am able to go, I'm in.

We stopped at one of the overlooks and asked a stranger to take our picture with our bikes. She employed an unusual form of picture taking, holding the phone high above her head and snapping away. I assure you, there are bikes in front of us, we didn't just throw on a bunch of spandex and start wandering around. Also, that is not a wig.

As we finally reached the end of the trail, we were all in awe of Reinke's ability to tame the trail aboard the Iron Horse.  It was basically the equivalent of Lane Meyer beating Roy Stalin while skiing the K12 on one ski.  If you think you're getting out of that reference, you are sorely mistaken.

When we got to the bottom of the trail, we met the rest of our contingent at the pool. Not sure how or why someone felt the need to build a pool this large, but even more ludicrous than the pool's dimensions was this sign.

It begs so many questions. Who determined that 2451 would create an out of control situation, but at 2450 it would be fine? Which poor chump in the pool's hierarchy is tasked with counting to 2450, and how would they know that none of the other 2449 have exited the pool during that time? I want to fight the person that felt this sign was necessary.

Once in town, we found a brewery/pizza joint that was perfect. These two were happily schlepping beers, and we got 3 giant pizzas that even in our ravenous state we couldn't finish. Just as we were wrapped up and getting ready to leave, I experienced a sensation shooting through my legs something akin to this:

Followed by this

Both hamstrings cramped at the same instant, sending me into an intense pain and contortionist position that only served to make everyone at our table (remember, we're here with 6 adults & 6 kids) into equally intense bouts of laughter. I was reduced to nothing, save for grabbing every glass of water on the table and pounding it. Reinke was quick to point out that in my time of dire need, it was unusual of me to drink it through a straw. Reason was not my friend at that point.

Finally, after regaining the use of my legs, I was able to exit the restaurant and begin the journey back to the campground. Once we returned, it was back to all play all the time.

As a final act before the kids went to bed, we headed to the fire tower (not to be confused with the moontower) for a quick pre-sunset climb.

Those are fatbikes down below for scale.

The tower felt like it was slightly lower than where Thorton Melon completed the Triple Lindy from.

On the way back to the campsite, we ran into the rest of the group and it was time for twilight (not dreamy Team Edward or Team Jacob twilight, but actual soft glowing light from the sky when the sun is below the horizon) playground adventures.  

From there, it was on to getting the kids to bed and gathering around the campfire.  After the day's beatdown on the trails, the campfire crew started to peel off to bed slowly, and pretty soon it was clear that we had all gotten old. Not mature, just old.

Day 3 would have us parting ways and continuing on our own toward Cumberland Falls.

2017 Big Truck across the Midwest, Day 1

This year's trip is a rare combo of a normal camping weekend with friends, followed by a quick jaunt into the midwest (IN, KY, TN) and back home. We'll start day 1 as mostly a travel day, as we didn't leave home until about 1pm.

The big truck had been packed up for a day or two, and I had the Jeep full of all manner of bicycle, scooter, and camping gear ready to roll.

The GPS said roughly a 5.5hr drive, but it does not factor in the AARP speeds at which our rig travels, so we knew we had a bit of a drive ahead of us.  I was already pretty beat, as we had a somewhat late night restaurant install the night before and I had gone in early this morning to drop off Reggie (Thanks Carol & Mike!). The fridge was stocked with Monsters & we were off. I was just hoping to avoid a situation like this.

Our destination was Brown County State Park, and all I really knew about it was that it was supposed to have some badass mountain bike trails. There were going to be 6 adults & 6 kids for the weekend, so we were really hoping the campground would be laid back and kid friendly. But not this kid friendly...

Fast forward a couple of hours, a bunch of construction, rain, and ineffective Monster Energies.  I do not drink coffee, really ever save for a stray Irish Coffee during March Madness. Realizing that I was not going to stay awake without outside intervention, I asked Kimberly to find me a coffee shop and order the most potent thing they are allowed to sell. She settled on some cold brew (uncut, whatever that means) concoction that tasted like the underside of a New York City manhole cover.

What happened next was a combination of the following:

The rain picked up considerably, but now we were only about an hour away.  That hour flew by pretty fast, as I believe I entered the spirit world momentarily.

As we rolled in and started to unhook the Jeep, we heard a roving band of d&bs (pond hockey term of endearment) yelling while riding their bikes through the parking lot. We had made it, and the Gentrys & Reinkes had already set up camp and made the social firepit of the 3 sites, which were both beautiful and enormous.

Next up was a quick setup, many Training Sessions, and an all too entertaining game of wrong-handed (throw and catch) football in which nearly all passes looked like Tebow throws.

or Tannehill...

For those of you expecting a Scott Mitchell clip, you should be ashamed of yourselves. That man has suffered enough just knowing how much of William Clay Ford's money he has stolen ($33 million), the last thing he needs is people realizing that the best thing announcers could say about him is that he throws the big interception at the wrong time (when is the right time to throw a big interception?).  Anyway, I give you the preview of the 1997 matchup of Scott Mitchell vs Gus Frerotte. Fox already knew the Lions were terrible by relegating us to Ron Pitts every week.

Anywho, after playing catch for a while and getting the chitlins to bed, we had a few beverages (more Training Sessions and a few Perceptions) around the campfire and put together a plan for the next day biking on the famed Brown County trail system.  Too many beverages and the ride would start out like this.

Day 2 would be spent on the bike trails followed by a ride into town.  Good times ahead.