We still can't really take a full length trip due to work/life constraints, so this one will be around 9-10 days and is basically a sprint from home to Maine & back, with a stay in Burlington and some pit stops along the way.
This year Jordan is 11 going on 21 and is going into 6th grade in a few weeks. She has developing quite a mouth and a stinging sense of sarcasm, both of which can be traced directly to her mom. We let her choose the destination this year - her choice was emphatically Maine, and for good reason. She wants to climb on rocks. Since you can't do that anywhere else in the contiguous United States, here we are. Shall we?
Day 1 began with an unprecedented 'wheels up' time of 7:30am. The female contingent of this household rarely stirs this early on a non schoolday, so this was a phenomenal start. We had 450 miles to our desitinaton, 2 Canadian border crossings, and an insane week to put behind us. Before we knew it, we had reached the Blue Water Bridge in Port Huron and were in a massive line to get into Canada.
I love Canadian jokes as much as anyone, and have spent a fair amount of time there in my post college years drinking their beer and making fun of their monopoly money. Now that I'm old and responsible, I notice a lot of other things about Canada. How nice their roads are!! We were heading across toward Niagra, and compared to Michigan roads, it felt like we were driving directly behind one of these.
The other thing I noticed is that leaving those yellow temporary splitter guards on Dodge Challengers is definitely not just an American thing. Case in point...
If you have no idea what I'm talking about, that will not be the only time you feel this way. To help you get up to speed, read this. Now you know that it is an international phenomenon. Another phenomenon that seemed to be present in Canada is vaping, bro. Yep - ripping fat clouds yo. I just know that the first dude Jordan brings home will probably have a sweet vape mod with a wallet chain attached to his JNCO jeans, so this pic is just helping me prepare.
Once we got rolling across Canada, we were greeted by a battalion of 'spiky windmills' as Jordan calls them.
We did pass within earshot, so hopefully we can remain windmill cancer free.
A little while later we were passed by this guy. A splattered bug on the windshield is partially obscuring the name, but yes, this man is delivering batteries that are 'Canada proof.' This made my brain hurt trying to figure out all of the things the engineers must have considered when constructing these batteries. "Well, Marketing decided to call these things Canada-proof. That means they have to be able to withstand at least the following: Geddy Lee dominating a bassline, Kokanee glacier-fresh beer, Jim Carrey paintings, the list is never ending!"
After many random inner monologues like that, we finally reached the US border a few miles north of Niagra. We have been to the falls a couple of times and I've been there at least twice more on the motorcycle, so we skipped the entire thing in the interest of an expedient border crossing. We were successful! Jordan didn't even end up in a cage, and we weren't greeted by an angry mob of citronella candle wielding MAGA Chads.
Once back on American soil, we were on the home stretch and couldn't wait to set up camp for the night and relax. When we reached our destination, it was as though we stepped into a time machine that took us back to the moment before any modern day campground convenience was invented. Our hosts were incredibly nice, which is why I won't mention the location. It was clear that the last dollar spent on any maintenance happened when Fred Durst was relevant, and the 'new releases' DVDs (wrap your head around that) still had the 2004 stickers on them in the camp store.
None of this mattered, as we had a pull through site, didn't have to unhook the Jeep, and got to take a walk through a remote path with wildlife all around us.
We met our site neighbor who was stranded for the next 3 days until a critical vacuum toilet component arrived, and that helped put things into perspective. Although the first day had been pretty stressful, hectic, and exhausting, it was the start of a fun adventure and our toilet still worked. Jordan busted out the jumprope, said about 10,000 words, and we caught an amazing sunset right out the back of the site.
Day 2 brings a drive up to Burlington, VT as we make our way to Maine. Solid day all around, although when I went up to the game room all the machines were unplugged so I couldn't even play
Madden '97 on their PS1. Another time...
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